Like a child caught smoking who is then forced to smoke a whole pack of cigarettes in an hour in order to get them to quit smoking, by becoming submerged in a work environment with a strong religious right presence, I was delivered from my own tendency to be part of the movement.  Let's face it, any group that backs a pro-life candidate who boasts of his 234 executions and advocates the teaching of creationism while supporting laws that exploit creation is clearly suspect. 

Make no mistake, I believe in creation, and I am uncompromisingly pro-life, but extreme politics is not how the ministry of Christ was ever meant to be accomplished.  It is with that in mind that I wrote the following:

Alaska has the cutest gov'nor any state has ever seen.
Palin's the hottest politician since Esther the Old Testament Queen.
And I'll never forget that evening she winked at me through my TV screen.
Tell me, how can I be wrong when I'm the religious right.

Nothing is more patriotic than toting a pistol or two.
America's West was settled by blasting Cherokee, Blackfoot and Sioux,
And if Jesus had been here incarnate, He'd have wasted some savages, too.
Tell me, how can I be wrong when I'm the religious right.

I believe in God the Creator; I'm a special jewel in His crown.
I reject evolution completely, Darwin's a heretic clown.
Every day I thank God for nature, now let's get busy cutting it down.
Tell me, how can I be wrong when I'm the religious right.

At least once a month you'll find me at an overpriced weekend retreat.
I attend Michael W's concerts, tickets cost forty bucks per seat,
But I don't give to the poor or the homeless,
They need to get jobs and get off my street.
Tell me, how can I be wrong when I'm the religious right.

Children should all have a nice home, led by one husband and wife.
Every time there comes an election, you can be sure I'll be voting pro-life.
But don't talk to me about adopting, that's too big a sacrifice.
Tell me, how can I be wrong, when I'm the religious right.

I pray for the gays and the perverts, immigrants from Sudan and Iraq.
I pray for the whores and their babies, born addicted to liquor and crack.
I ask God to bless them and heal them, and keep them off of my cul-de-sac.
Tell me, how can I be wrong when I'm the religious right.